Remember, at the stroke of midnight on 15th May 2020, South Africa’s twelve month schedule free moratorium on cannabidiol (CBD) ends. By tomorrow morning, all your CBD products will revert back to being schedule 4 controlled substances. This of course means, all those tinctures, balms, edibles and lifestyle products you’ve ferreted away, will require the signature of a medical professional for you to safely and legitimately harbour them in your home. Despite the WHO proclaiming CBD to be as safe as anything on the planet, the SAHPRA school of infinite cannabis wisdom has deemed it a controllable cannabinoid. This decision is obviously based on control and ker-ching, not on peer reviewed studies.

With the deafening silence from our esteemed medical regulators on the matter, we suggest you round up all your almost illegal CBD infusions, pack and label them, and head off to your nearest police station to hand them in to the proper authorities.

This will ensure the proper medical waste destruction protocols will be adhered to, 20mg at a time.

Of course, the regulators may well have overlooked this critical juncture due the covid lock down and a perfectly amicable compromise will ensue. Maybe the status quo will remain until the end of time. Maybe SAHPRA will invoke the blatant lunacy of inserting CBD into their special Schedule Zero, thereby making it an oxymoronic, pharma controlled, over-the-counter ‘health product’ with no medical claims being possible. The only people who would be vaguely excited about the prospect of schedule ‘0’ would  be the companies that pass muster for GMP in the controlled and befokly anal world of  medical regulations.

As with all things SAHPRA, we wait with baited breath to see how outlandish the next phase of medical cannabis capture will be. Maybe they’ve forgotten all about it and are busy peddling illicit tobacco on the underground market. Maybe they mistakenly take us all for fools as they are want to do, and are conjuring up a special schedule for the most benign cannabinoid of all just to totally confuse us.

No prescription required, unless you intend wearing a T-shirt and open toe shoes to purchase it between 9am and midday in selected metro area.

It goes without saying, you’ll have to be accompanied by both parents.

This article originally appeared on fieldsofgreenforall.co.za and was published with permission.

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Photo by Kimzy Nanney on Unsplash